I’m writing this from the airport after tearful goodbyes the past few days. There’s been so much love.
This time has been beautiful, difficult, complex, and precious. I was in the first batch of students. We were all on our mats at 3:45 a.m. In all my wildness I can be quite shy so, strategically, I placed my yoga mat on the stage right next to Sharathji’s chair. The whole season I had the privilege of taking my Mysore Ashtanga practice at his feet. It was a type of surrender I didn’t know I had in me. The idea of surrender, especially to my American mind, has always made me feel weak. All my power is in what I possess. This is the conditioning. But this devotion to a practice, place, teacher, and the students has blown the lid off. The energy is so strong. So brilliant.
I spent an entire four seasons in India avoiding temples and prayer. I have my reasons for being protective of my sadhana. Talking about spirituality often makes me feel like a feral cat, scrappy and anxious. Something about this trip stripped that fear away. I understand that much of the worship here is tied in with a deep appreciation for the good as well as the shit. All temples are placed in a special way in accordance to the planets. Everything seems chaotic but there is gentle care there. I was able to roam temples with my mentor, myself, and my dear friends. Everything came together so clearly and for the first time I understood, I’ve always been cradled in the divine. Even when I wasn’t paying attention.
I fell in love with the goddess Durga. She’s come to me full force. I’m told the road with her is full of change that feels like mischief, power, and destruction. But love doesn’t leave you with a choice. She is as much mine as I am hers. I spent a lot of time at her temple. Studying her arms carrying so much brilliance and in the center a straight spine and half smile. Stunning. My friends and I took my new red coral mala to Chamundishwara and had it blessed by the swami. My friends sat outside her temple and chanted her mantra while I looked to the ancient brick and the people swarming in and out. The air was warm and the sky was blue. We all were covered in dirt and sweat. It was perfect. After that day we all slowly began the transition home.
It’s been beautiful and gut-wrenching to say goodbye to everyone. There is deep change afoot and I’m not comforted by I’ll see you soon. Things are always moving and when I see their sweet faces nothing and everything will be the same. Maybe even better. So I offer the glorious and the shit goodbye just the same, taking fire worship and a toss to the wind. In the end, there is only love. Always.
So… February and 2018.
My intention is to meet you all where you’re at these next few months. I’ll take some time and feel out the teaching. Talk with you. Try to understand what energy is there and what information is going to be useful for your growth and steadiness. In the coming weeks 2018 will start to take shape but for now, I’m coming back centered but a little stutter struck. Let’s take it slow.
Buffalo winters aren’t easy. Change will come. Let’s practice.
Alright, folks. I’ll see you on Saturday. My practice is going to be finished by 8:00 a.m and I’ll be doing a small ritual to put Ganesh to sleep for a bit and get Durga upon the altar. Come early if you can.
Photos from India:
I’ve been sharing a lot of great pictures of the trip through my Instagram page. click here for the link 🙂
Thursday, February 15th
New Moon in Aquarius ( partial solar eclipse )
I have a doula training at the end of the month
Saturday 2/24 will be self-practice.
Unless it’s not and I get a lovely teacher in for you guys. If this happens I’ll let you know.
Pop up Led Primary Series class Saturday 2/3
Same time same place.
I’m getting some coffee at Daily Planet after. I’m dying to see you all and catch up. Super casual. Come if you can.
Maggie is going to be joining us at AYB and will be popping by for a coffee. She’s been at this ashtanga thing for a while. Let’s love on her a bit and give her a warm welcome!
Third Saturday Led Primary Series and Conference 2/17
- 8:30-10:00 Led Class
- 10:00-10:30 (this will run late. Stay if you can.)
Sharathji made some big changes this season. We’ll take some time to clarify and answer any questions you might have about what that will mean for us and the greater community moving forward. I was split in the second series which means I have some authority and ability to teach those asanas now.
AYB is in great standing with the institute. I’m all in with keeping it this way.
Also, Angela was certified! Huge. I’ll go into the significance of this as well.
There will be time for Q and A afterward.